Family dinner last night. My tía asks how school is going. I say it's good, working on a big essay. She looks at me confused and says, "But mija, you were working on an essay last month. Is it the same one?"
I tried to explain. Research. Outlining. Drafting. Revising. Citations. She nodded like she understood, but I could see her eyes glazing over. Later I heard her tell my mom, "She's still in school? I thought she'd be done by now."
They don't get it. In their world, you work, you finish, you get paid. School is just... more school. Endless. Pointless? Maybe to them.
I'm the first in my family to go to college. I'm proud of that. But the gap between my world and theirs keeps growing. They don't know what a thesis statement is. They don't know why I spend hours in the library. They just see me "still in school" while my cousins have jobs and babies and lives.
The guilt is real. Like I'm being selfish, taking this time for myself. Like I should just hurry up and be done so I can be a real adult.
Any other first-gens feel this? How do you bridge the gap? How do you make them proud without making them feel left behind?
I tried to explain. Research. Outlining. Drafting. Revising. Citations. She nodded like she understood, but I could see her eyes glazing over. Later I heard her tell my mom, "She's still in school? I thought she'd be done by now."
They don't get it. In their world, you work, you finish, you get paid. School is just... more school. Endless. Pointless? Maybe to them.
I'm the first in my family to go to college. I'm proud of that. But the gap between my world and theirs keeps growing. They don't know what a thesis statement is. They don't know why I spend hours in the library. They just see me "still in school" while my cousins have jobs and babies and lives.
The guilt is real. Like I'm being selfish, taking this time for myself. Like I should just hurry up and be done so I can be a real adult.
Any other first-gens feel this? How do you bridge the gap? How do you make them proud without making them feel left behind?